“Ricki, stop being so much in your head. Sure, you can intellectualize it. But what does your gut tell you?”
As someone who came to entrepreneurship rather late in life, I’ve grown accustomed to hearing comments like these from my coaches and mentors.
The problem is, pretty much the only thing my gut ever tells me is, “Okay, time to eat.”
I’ve spent decades attempting to tap into my intuitive self. I’d love nothing more than to be able to go with what she knows on a gut level. But so far, that part of my inner knowing has remained elusive.
I imagine most women possess spidey senses when it comes to walking home at night or strangers lurking behind lamp posts or in the parking lot (how many of us haven’t clutched our keys in our fists as a makeshift weapon “just in case”?). But those senses are hard-earned and we know the consequences of not tapping into them.
On the other hand, more innocuous messages–like, is that guy sincere when he says he’ll call you? Will your friend really return that $200 you lent to her? Does it make sense to let your teen go to the Taylor Swift concert and stay overnight in an Airbnb with her friends?--well, those can be tougher to assess.
When it comes to business, I’ve experienced both good and bad outcomes because I went with what I believed, intellectually, was the “right choice.”
Who knows? Perhaps my first program would have sold out if I hadn’t used a webinar, all the rage at the time, to promote it. Or maybe I shouldn’t have hired that one web designer who promised the moon but whose fee seemed a tad inexpensive. What about that potential client for whom I jumped through hoops to create an alternate payment plan–and who then informed me, “On second glance, my calendar is too full and I can’t join after all”?
Looking back, these were all instances where, had I heeded the barely perceptible flutter in my gut, I might have saved myself the trouble.
My dogs, on the other hand, express a healthy degree of gut reactions. True, dogs do have naturally fine-tuned instincts that we humans can only admire and accept (if we’re smart, that is).
For instance, it’s been reported often that dogs can inuit the onset of natural disasters such as earthquakes or thunderstorms. Is it because they sense the change in barometric pressure? One theory asserts they can hear the rocks crumbling underneath the surface. (I believe it. After all, they can hear your heart beating from across the room).
And most of us have read at least one news story about dogs who detected cancer in their owners long before the doctors did–thereby saving their human’s life.
When it comes to trusting others (or not), dogs seem to have that nailed down as well. Could they have saved me from that tire-kicking client? Who knows.
But they do have an uncanny ability to assess someone’s personality in an instant, then express their feelings on the subject. I know one woman who won’t date anyone her dog doesn’t like.
Zoey, who is the most dog-friendly pup I’ve ever known, communicated instant loathing (read: snarling, growling, barking, straining-on-the-leash-and-almost-dislocating-my-shoulder type loathing) for Baxter, one of our neighbor’s dogs, even before they got anywhere near each other.
Was this just a quirky response to a pale-coated Goldendoodle, visually the exact opposite to Zoey’s own black, sleek and satiny-coated visage? As it turns out, Chaser before her had the identical response to Baxter. I think it must be something in Baxter’s aura they don’t like.
Similarly, there are times when Zoey (and previously, Elsie) refuses to walk over a certain spot on the street, or enter a particular doorway. Can she sense the impaired foundation holding it in place? Maybe the scent of a previous crime lingers in the air? I’ll never know.
But I do know this: if my dog tells me someone isn’t trustworthy, I’m going to go with that assessment.
All this is not to say that “gut instincts” are all negative. I can identify at least a handful of instances, in retrospect, where my own intuition did kick in and brought with it positive outcomes.
I’d never have found the dream house that my dear friend and I shared after my marriage broke up, if not for a hunch based on the street address alone.
I’d never have given my husband a second chance after we broke up that first summer if I hadn’t followed the tingle in my heart telling me he was, deep down, a sweet and loving person (though he ostensibly did his best to hide that fact). And here we are, recently celebrating 26 years together.
I’d never have ended up with one of the smartest, sweetest and most intelligent dogs I’ve known (Hi, Zoey!) if I hadn’t gone with the deep, insistent conviction that she had it in her all along.
Ah, well, maybe my own gut feelings aren’t nonexistent after all. Maybe it’s just a matter of tapping in more regularly, and allowing the instincts to make themselves known–and then heed them.
Wouldn’t you love to be one of those people who always “goes with her gut” and, consequently, avoids all manner of negative experiences in life because your instinct told you not to go to that party, board that plane, walk alone, or eat that day-old ceviche?
I know I would. So this week, dear gut: bring on the invisible signs.
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Follow up to last week’s challenge: Unleash Your Creativity.
Ah, the elusive creative spark. The thing that, when you least expect it, reveals itself to you in all its eccentric glory. Here, Creativity! Creativity, C’mon Down! Ah, Creativity. . . . where are you??
It’s one of those experiences you can’t force. But when it does hit you, true creativity feels like a minor miracle. And it’s usually kinda fun, too.
After attending a workshop for those of us who’ll be presenting at a conference this fall, I was flooded with creative ideas about my speech. Now I’m even more excited than I was previously to plot out and practice what I’ll deliver. So many different potential approaches! So much to talk about!
That’s the beauty of a creative streak, isn’t it? You’re met with a surplus of new ideas and methods to try out. And sometimes, the craziest of the lot proves to be the most viable.
Apart from speech ideas, I also spent a bit of creative playtime in the kitchen.
Coming up with original recipes has always felt like a creative pursuit to me, and when I’m bored, anxious, stressed or uncertain, a bout in the kitchen tends to bring clarity (and, more often than not, a yummy snack as well).
Hubby certainly appreciated the Fudge Brownie Ice Cream Cake I whipped up a couple of days ago. We’ve been feasting on sugarfree, grainfree, dairyfree, eggfree nutfree cake since then.
(Oh, and this will be one of the recipes in my upcoming cookbook in the fall. Leave a comment or message me with your email and I’ll get your name on the notification list if you think you’d be interested. All recipes free of sugar, gluten, eggs and dairy, with 90% also grainfree).
Yay for food creativity! I’m still waiting for the old childlike creative impulses of yore to reappear. . . but for now, this felt like a good start.
Comment and share one of your own most creative moments!
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As always, thank you for reading. If you enjoy Be the Dog, please share it with someone else! Or support me and my writing with a paid or free subscription. I’d be eternally grateful either way.
that pie looks awesome. I would certainly be interested in your upcoming book so please include me on the notification list. thanks